


Remember Yesterday

by Rainbow_Whale_Shark



Category: K (Anime)
Genre: Angst, Awkward Romance, Bittersweet Ending, Gay, Hurt/Comfort, Lack of Communication, M/M, One Shot, Teenage Dorks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-26
Updated: 2019-07-26
Packaged: 2020-07-20 13:13:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19992790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainbow_Whale_Shark/pseuds/Rainbow_Whale_Shark
Summary: What if Fushimi and Yata actually talked about their problems instead of fighting them out?





	Remember Yesterday

**Author's Note:**

> I love these idiots so much. If you want to gush with me about anything K related, shoot me an ask me here:
> 
> kprojectimaginesblog.tumblr.com
> 
> I'm so sorry for grammar issues in advance 🙏

A knife pressed into Yata's neck as he backed up into the wall, facing his old friend turned nemesis, Fushimi Saruhiko. He ambushed him while he was on patrol, and despite Yata's prowess in combat, he was caught off guard. 

"I know you won't do it, stupid fucking monkey." Yata sneered at Fushimi, who only put more pressure on the knife in response. 

The clouds in the sky rolled ominously, a distant promise of a huge storm, both in the sky and on the ground. 

"Tell me why I won't, Misaki."

"Because I can see it in your eyes. I know you, Saru-" 

"You don't know anything. Especially not me." Despite saying this, the grip he had on his knife visibly loosened, further proving Yata's point that Fushimi had no intent on killing him.

"That's bullshit and you know it. Everyone knows you don't just…forget everything you know about a person like that."

The anger in Fushimi's face changed to something almost psychotic, and for a moment, Yata thought he might change his mind about killing him. He protectively gripped Fushimi's wrist, noting how much his hands shook. "But you'll forsake that friendship the minute something better comes along. You never cared, Misaki, you were just waiting until you could get away from me."

"Is that what you've been thinking all this time? I never stopped caring about you stupid monkey! I…never stopped. Even when you started acting like a complete ass, I still worry about you!" Yata shook his head, hating how much he meant those words. 

"You're not supposed to, dammit! Why? Why don't you hate me for everything I've done?" This wasn't how Fushimi's plan was supposed to go. "This would be so much easier if you'd hate me…"

"Was all of this just a fucking cry for attention, Saru?" Fushimi nodded, blankly looking at the wall behind Yata. "Were you really so desperate to resort to harassing me every day, screaming insults and changing our whole dynamic?" 

"I didn't want you to move on, and since you've clearly forgotten everything good we had between us, I tried to create something horrible for you to remember me by."

"You've never known how to show your emotions, have you?" Yata chuckled to himself; maybe some things were the same. "Just talk to me, Saruhiko."

Yata's grip on Fushimi's wrist tightened and Fushimi released the knife, letting it clatter to the ground. The first few drops of rain began falling as thunder rumbled in the distance, but neither cared. Yata pulled Fushimi down so he almost fell on top of him, their faces inches apart. Feeling his guard drop for the first time in a very long time, Fushimi suddenly felt very vulnerable. 

"If you cared so much, then why'd you abandon me for those dumbasses in HOMRA?" All the anger had left Fushimi's voice, leaving only an uncertain, wavering tone. "You were so focused on impressing them that you forgot me."

"I didn't forget you! It was clear that you wanted more than HOMRA could offer you; you're brilliant, Saru! I had to make new friends because I didn't want to be alone after you left." Yata met Fushimi's eyes, and the expression he had cut Yata to the core. "It was hard after you left, and the way you acted didn't make it any better. I thought you hated me." 

Yata was right, once again. Fushimi was at a loss for words; was it really all his fault? 

"Is that…true? Did I lose you because I pushed you away?" Fushimi knew Yata wouldn't ever lie about something like this, but disbelief got the better of him. 

"How can you be so smart yet so stupid, Saru? I'm still here, you didn't lose me." With that, Yata pulled Fushimi all the way down so he was sitting in his lap. Clutching the front of his coat, Yata pressed his lips to Fushimi's insistently, to which Fushimi responded in kind. 

The kiss was sloppy and uncoordinated, much like their tumultuous relationship. Fushimi's whole body trembled; it was clear that even without the rain, he was cold. Yata was there though, so he felt fine, better than fine. He warmed his shivering body and kept him steady, just as he always had. 

"I...didn't mean to…" Somewhat breathless, Fushimi kept his arms around Yata, partially for warmth but mostly because it just felt right. 

"Saru, you can't keep taking shit care of yourself. Come back to my apartment, we need to get out of the rain." The way Yata was nagging him felt just like the old times, and they made it to Yata's apartment without saying a word to each other. 

"You remember where the bathroom is. Start the shower and I'll join you." Yata sighed as he threw off his wet hat and jacket, turning the heat on for Fushimi's sake. 

"Join me?" 

"You wanna pay my water bill?" 

"Fair enough." Fushimi sauntered off, his heart beating a bit faster than he'd like it to. 

The water was blessedly warm, and Fushimi could finally stop shivering. He heard Yata step in a few moments later, groaning as the water had the same effect on him. 

"Do you want me to wash your hair? Like…like old times?" Yata's voice was small, and though he wasn't looking at him, Fushimi could tell he was blushing just by the way he sounded. It wasn't anything unusual, besides the fact that it had been years since they were last that close. 

Fushimi simply sat down in front of Yata, facing the wall in a wordless conformation. Yata sat behind him, pouring shampoo into his hands. It was something so small, so routine for them, but that one small gesture meant more than one would think. Fushimi's hair was soft, but it was a tangled mess, further confirming Yata's suspicion that he wasn't taking care of himself at all. 

"Saru, why did we never talk about it?" Comb in hand, Yata picked at each knot with surprising precision. 

"I thought you wanted to wash my hair, not ask questions that don't matter anymore. Ow, damn you!" Yata tugged particularly hard at a knot, disliking Fushimi's response. "Because! Because I was hurt, I guess. I was angry and I just wanted to run away instead of dealing with the problem. Like always."

"What about after? Have you hated me this whole time?" Yata sounded like he was on the verge of tears, but he swore that even if it broke him, he'd get closure. 

"Tch…I never hated you, dumbass. I tried to convince myself I did, but I only ended up being angry with myself." Fushimi muttered this, almost talking to himself.

"It's not all your fault. It's a two way street, communication, I mean. I never reached out to you." Yata laughed cynically, halfway regretting this conversation. "If only we could go back and do it over…"

"That's a stupid thought. There's no point in wishing for a miracle to whisk away the consequences of our actions." Fushimi now felt the weight of Yata's head resting between his shoulders and his arms draping over him. 

"Isn't that the point of wishful thinking? To imagine how it could have been different?" 

Yata didn't realize this, but Fushimi considered this daily, wondering how everything could've gone if either had made even a slightly different choice. 

Lifting his head up, he finished combing Fushimi's hair. "I guess you're right. It doesn't matter now. Here, I'm done." Yata's tone was disappointed, but he stepped out of the shower anyway, leaving Fushimi to sit in the water for a bit longer. 

"I left some clothes by the sink for you. Try not to get water all over the floor." Just like that, the door shut, and Fushimi was once again alone. No, he wasn't alone, Yata's in the other room; this shouldn't even upset Fushimi anyway. He's moved on from Yata and HOMRA, right? 

He stayed in for a while longer, trying to clear his mind of these disrupting thoughts before he faced Yata again. He knew that Yata would want to talk again, and he also knew that he wouldn't be able to hide his true emotions anymore if he asked questions. Fushimi turned off the water, groaning at the sudden chill he felt and the thought of breaking down in front of Yata. 

"Hey," came Yata's voice from the kitchen. "I know you haven't been eating well, so I made stir fry. You have to eat all the vegetables, Saruhiko; don't think I can't see how much your hands are shaking."

Fushimi simply clicked his tongue in annoyance, wishing Yata would forget at least one detail about him. 

They ate in silence, neither knowing just what to say to the other. Uneasy tension filled the room when Yata cleared the plates away. He kept glancing toward Fushimi, who in turn stared intently at the wall. 

"So…" Yata began uncertainly, "I guess it's business as usual tomorrow then?" He found it easier to avoid Fushimi's glance by hand washing the dishes, despite the dishwasher. 

"What else would we do? We can't go back to how we were, Misaki, don't you realize that?" It hurt Fushimi deeply to say these words, but they needed to be said. 

"I know! I just don't know how, after all this." The plates clattered in this sink as Yata dropped them to face Fushimi, who seemed to be looking through him. 

"We chose different sides and that's that, you have to drop it. I'm leaving." Slamming his hands on the table, he pushed his chair back, standing and abruptly turning towards the door. 

"Please…don't just leave like this." Yata's voice sounded broken, and his expression matched. It stopped Fushimi dead in his tracks, one hand on the doorknob. 

Part of Fushimi wanted to go to Yata, to comfort him like he always used to. The logical part of his brain took over, reminding him not to indulge the Red clansmen, that nothing good would come of it, telling him to get out before he gets to you. He almost made it, but soon enough, Yata's arms were around him again, and it felt right. For the first time in years, Fushimi's emotions got the better of him, and he turned to match Yata's embrace. 

"This doesn't change anything." Fushimi lied, trying to convince himself more than Yata. 

"I know." Yata knew it changed everything, and the following weeks would leave them both confused and feeling far too many things at once. 

That night was the most peaceful yet tense night they'd ever had. They were nothing more than a tangle of limbs, each watching the other's back, knowing that morning promised nothing but pain and loneliness.


End file.
